Friday, October 10, 2008

Tim Higgins, Columnist?

Yes boys and girls it's true!

Michael Miller, Editor In Chief of the Toledo Free Press (and a really nice guy), has accepted written material from your humble servant as a column in this week's edition. Now before you begin to question the sanity of these nice people, recognize that Michael and the Free Press are far too intelligent to actually throw money away by paying me for such labors. They have simply done me the kindness of exposing my particular brand of nonsense to a wider audience.

My thanks to you Michael for printing "COSI - Three Strikes", and my sympathies. I fear that your support to date will probably be repaid by a greater level of annoyance in the future. I can only hope that as time goes by, you will not come to regret the kind opportunity you have provided to me, as I bombard you with material for future use.

Update: I forgot to mention, in my haste to dislocate my arm patting myself on the back, that the column printed was on one of my favorite local targets, the Toledo Center of Science and Industry, coming up once again for a levy in November.


Roland Hansen said...

I was thinking I should comment, but I'm afraid it won't be off the record.

Tim Higgins said...

That's alright Roland, I would keep anything you said listed as from an unnamed, but reliable source.

Roland Hansen said...

Well, as long as I can remain anonymous, I might make some comments. You know me (well, in cyberland, anyways, if not in the real world and in person) and that I do not like for anyone to know what I think because I am so insecure that I fear someone may try to get even with me or seek revenge or try to harm me. I'm a natural coward that way, you know.

I want to know whose palm got greased for you to have such an esteemed position with the Toledo Free Press.

Is Michael Miller crazy or hard up or did he just need the graft payola?

Sometimes, I wish I weren't just an old washed-up cast-aside has-been who serves no useful purpose in the world! Oh, wait a minute, doesn't that qualify me to be a Lucas County Commissioner or a Toledo City Councilman or maybe even Mayor of Toledo?

My gosh, I think Tim Higgins is doing more than just blowing smoke. Inhale deeply, now.
oops, am I in trouble?

I sure hope y'all know I'm just teasing! Am I really?

Seriously (and that's difficult for me), congratulations and best wishes. A well-deserved assignment. I hope Mr. Miller at least provides you some compensation. You, well maybe I should say your writings are worth it.


Tim Higgins said...


Of course posting comments on this blog assures anonymity, as you are one of only 2 or 3 people who read this tripe. As for cowardice and insecurity, stand in line brother, I have the franchise. As for the rest...

The list of those greased is both long and undistinguished.

My assumption about Michael is temporary insanity, and with luck he will not recover.

As for your self-commentary, never cast aspersions on an Amigo my friend, nor condemn yourself to political servitude without good cause.

As for what I am doing, I am currently studying at the Carty Finkbeiner school of fertilizer production, and a good bit of my recent output reflects this.

Thanks for the vote of confidence. (At least, I think that's what it was)

Roland Hansen said...

Si, Senor Higgins, mi amigo. Confidence in you I have.

That was indeed my vote. And I promise you, I will not vote you into political elective office.

However, it is you and Senor Hooda and me who are ready to save the world from injustice everywhere it raises its ugly head with our own heads held up high and proud.
Now LET'S RIDE into the sunset!