Thursday, May 30, 2013

The "Stuck On Stupid" Dictionary #40

The normally lazy lexicographers of the 'Stuck on Stupid' Dictionary have, to amazement of most of the staff, produced a second effort within the same month.  Some here at headquarters many are convinced that they felt that they were concerned at being out performed by the Department of Just Blowing Smoke Security: but I'm convinced that this latest effort is a challenge that they could not refuse, since it was a suggestion by Maggie Thurber, to whose inspiration they owe their miserable little positions.  Quite frankly, those in Senior Staff don't really care what the reason is as long as they don't have to continue to make excuses for their lack of control over this normally rogue department.

Such inconsistent production however, means that there may actually be those of you reading this who have somehow managed to miss previous postings on this subject (shame on you, now go back and search all of the postings under the label of  'Dictionary').  For those of you thus unfamiliar, the SOS dictionary is a reference guide to terms which nominally mean something to the rest of the English speaking world, but appears to mean something entirely different when looked at through the jaded eyes and rose colored glasses of the SOS dictionary staff.

Double Dip:

1. The achievement of getting a second (and sometimes equal or better) measure from the same source.

2. To earn a salary from the source of one position while collecting a pension from a similar source or especially from having held the same position previously.

3. The circumstance when a city charges taxes of every resident to create a police or fire department, then charges them additionally for the costs involved with using it (voluntarily or not).

4. The situation where utility company charges an individual at a standard rate for a provided service, then charges them additionally if the such usage is considered too much or too little service to make the utility profitable enough.


Roland Hansen said...

Mi Amigo, Tim,
Please excuse me; but, I am stuck on reading your blog.

Roland Hansen said...

And one more thing (just to make a double comment):
Double your pleasure, double your fun, with double......