Wednesday, October 31, 2007

The Dumbing Down of America

The United States of America is the only superpower left in the world, but I suspect that this will not remain the case forever. Oh don't misunderstand me, I have no special knowledge of an imminent threat to our country. It's just that I cannot believe that we will remain a superpower for any length of time when we are getting so stupid.

"Oh no Tim," you say, "We are the smartest and most creative culture on the planet."
Really, well factor these into the equation and consider your answer again: - We now admit that wrestling is fake, and it's more popular than ever in spite of that. We even still believe in the story lines that they spin for us, and require multiple leagues and shows to feed our fascination with this fiction. 

- Airlines think that they can save us in a crash situation by instructing us on how to use a seatbelt and breathe through a mask.  

- We have more reality shows on TV than Orville Redenbacher has popcorn kernels, with each one sinking lower on the "Jerry Springer Scale" than the last. 

 - Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider, and Ben Stiller are actually considered movie stars! 

 - We require safety stickers to keep us from putting our heads in the microwave or our kids into the dryer. 

- Hollywood has so little creativity left in stories for movies that it has sunk to remaking even bad movies like "Hairspray", with John Travolta in women' s clothing (...and I thought that Saturday Night Fever was a low point for him).  

- Minneapolis thinks that the best way to prevent men from picking up each other for sex in it's airport bathrooms is to lower the walls in the stalls. 

- "Two and a Half Men" is currently the #1 show on television. 

- People applying for citizenship know more about this country's history than it's own citizens do. 

- We have designed cash registers to tell the people using them the proper amount of change to give out (and still they get it wrong a fair share of the time). 

- Hilary Clinton has a legitimate chance to become president of the United States! 

Now what do you think? I thought so. It's pretty hard to remain smug when confronted with the ugly truth, isn't it? This country has begun to enter a period in its history where it's collective IQ is a number far to close to it's average show size.  

Well don't worry boys and girls, by the time that this country finally sinks to the level to which we seem to aspire, we will all probably be so dumb that we will barely notice it. Then again, even it we did, we probably wouldn't care as long as we can get our reality shows five days a week, with an Adam Sandler or Ben Stiller movie festival for the weekend. While I still have what little of the brains that I came into the world with (no comments, please), I feel that I can come to only one conclusion: "There is probably no cure for aggressive stupidity."


Chad Quigley said...

Tim my firend...

You forgot to mention how we have allowed China to virtually take over the country in terms of production, cash, ownership of American land, and enterprise all in the name of "Global Economy".

A prime example is the Toyota headquarters on 23 where the Michigan Mental Hospital use to be. Then you have the German Owned Chrysler, and virtually all of the electronics you can buy are not from here or anywhere close to here.

The wealth of the Middle East taking over the mini-marts, food chains, gas stations, and textile business. We ship our food to them and they continue to kill us in oil.

I've also had enough of the idea that we invaded Iraq for oil..LOL If that were they case, why then are we paying double what we use to for it? It's like saying gay people wake up one day and decide to be Gay. Who in the hell would do that with all the problems that come with it? OIL=DUMB!

We pay more now than we ever have for everything. Why?? Because we import it all! And yet we scoff at Canada for having little National product.

America had we buy it all.

Tim Higgins said...

You add some very valid points Chad. They were putting up a big new KIA factory down near my last place of residence in LaGrange, GA when I left, so add the Koreans to your list of people taking over. There is little doubt that we and our government appear to be too stupid to realize that the next wave of foreign takeover is going on in the US.

My only excuse for not going into that part of it may be that I have moved further down the stupid scale than I had realized (though I suspect that it was more that the concept depressed me too much to want to deal with).

On the other hand, I am encouraged by the fact that I have not succumbed to watching either wrestling or reality shows. A small victory I know, but I take them where I find them.

Chad Quigley said...

I never did like about brain drain. I at one time like survivor and amazing race, 1st Of course, that was while I was asleep at the wheel myself.

Not to worry pal, we'll likely be long gone before the new flags go up. Not that we'll die of old age of course. Sounds fatalist I know, and I don't mean to be, just an observation.

On the H-Bomb...well, does this mean she'll have all male interns? And who's gonna keep Billy out of the back hallways? ;-)

Chad Quigley said...

Oh, Oh, Oh...I forgot...

Poptart Spears matters...

Tim Higgins said...

Well if we have to talk about the vapid Poptart, we shouldn't forget to give an honorable mention to "We'll always have Paris", and "Asleep at the wheel Lohan".

On the H-bomb. This could be the single greatest aid to speeding up diplomacy (if it happens, God forbid) that we have ever seen. What national leader would leave their spouse alone with Bill for any length of time? Hell, the picture taking will probably last longer than the meetings.

Chad Quigley said...

You'd think they'd aviod navy

Chad Quigley said...

Speaking of Jeep..check out my blog man.. 13 had a host of terrible information..750 jobs cut, the whole 3rd shift.

Hooda Thunkit said...

Guys relax, everything is going according to plan.

As soon as we are OWNED by the rest of the world, it'll be THERE problem to deal with, not ours ;-)

Tim Higgins said...


Boy am I glad that someone has this figured out and that it is part of a plan.

Hey listen, if we get a choice I would like to be owned by France. The wine is pretty good, and you get to surrender quick enough to avoid any real casualties.

Chad Quigley said...

Do we come with a warranty?? LOL

Tim Higgins said...

I would guess not.

Nor would we come with adequate safety warnings or child-proof packaging.

... let the buyer beware