Here therefore are my list of companies that should receive multi-billion government bailouts, based on nothing but their importance to me personally. (Please note that I am not saying that any of these companies actually need bailing out, but when have I ever let logic like that ever get in the way of my decision making processes?):
Google - For no other reason than that they provide me the platform (Blogspot) to spew this nonsense upon an unsuspecting public. Blizzard Entertainment - The creators of World of Warcraft (one of my other sources of non-productive entertainment) to insure that this source of significant wasted hours in my life remains available to me.
Dell - The choice of manufacturer is arbitrary; but without some form of computer, it would be impossible to use either of the above.
Cigar Manufacturers / Retailers - For without out them, how would I blow smoke?
California Wine Growers / Wineries - Hey, you need something to sip while smoking a cigar and playing WOW or writing a blog posting.
Coca Cola & Pepsi Cola - Man does not live by wine alone.
AM Radio Stations - For I am well and truly addicted to talk radio.
Yum! Brands Inc. - You probably don't recognize this company, but they own the franchises for Taco Bell, KFC, A&W, Pizza Hut, and Long John Silvers. That should keep me in fast food even if McDonalds falls.
Kroeger - OK, I will concede that I probably need a grocery store around to buy food not found at the fast food places listed above (you know, like snacks and the previously mentioned Soda and Wine).
This list is by no means complete, and I am sure that others will come to mind over time. There may also be worthy and valuable inclusions from readers out there that I have simply overlooked, so please feel free to suggest.
Please note that while being completely self-serving in my list, I do not mention my employer in this list. While I am relatively sure they would accept the money if offered, I will not mention for them out of a fear of losing the checks that keep me bailed out from week-to-week.