Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Trivial Pursuit #1

I have gotten awfully serious in some of my most recent postings, and while these are things that I very much believe in, the concept of being serious for any length of time is something foreign to my nature. I was looking through the lexicon of useless and nonsensical information which I use as a reference source for the normally more silly postings that I do each week when I realized that simply sharing some of information from this wealth of lunacy could do three things:  

1. Provide a bit of potential humor in what has seemed like a humorless week in my life (well, this stuff makes me laugh anyway).
2. Provide some insight into my thinking while doing these postings (a process so dangerous that only the most foolish should attempt it).  
3. Provide me the opportunity to assemble a posting with little or no effort (and doing things with little or no effort is one of things that I do best).  

Since I have this reference source divided into (3) parts, the information shared here is likewise divided. Please enjoy this humble offering in the spirit of laziness with which it is offered:

FACTS (?)  
There was no chemical fertilizer available during the 16th and 17th Century, only the natural fertilizer manure. Like any other bulk product of the time, it was predominantly shipped by water, and was shipped dry in order to reduce its shipping weight. During the shipping process however, water coming up from the bilges was often introduced to this product while being stored below decks, not only increasing its weight, but beginning again the natural fermentation process of decomposition. This fermentation process produces, as most know, methane gas; which then began to build up below decks in the hold of the ship. When sailors went down below decks to inspect the cargo with an oil lamp – BOOM!  After several ships were lost because of this, manure began to be labeled Ship High In Transit, to keep it as far away from water exposure as possible. Thus did manure become SHIT. (I have to say that this one seems a little shaky to me, but even if it's not true, it's too good a story to pass up.)  

Honey is the only food that doesn’t spoil.  

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television was Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

MY WISDOM (wisdom being a relative term in this case)  
The most dangerous single word in the English language is “Blasphemy”. It is a word of accusation that requires no proof and can carry the most terrible of consequences.

The level of intelligence, common sense, and good manners of a group of people often seems to have an inverse relationship to its numbers.  

Life consists of a series of glorious successes and monumental failures. The trick is to be able to survive them both.  

If you think that stealth technology is restricted to (or was invented by) the military, than you have never been a supervisor looking for an employee who just screwed up big time.

TRUE WISDOM  

Confusion is always the most honest response. - Marty Indik  

Books have the same enemies as people: fire, humidity, animals, weather, and their own content. – Paul Valery 

Experience comes from bad judgment.- Unknown  

Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one. - Malcolm Forbes  

An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows. - Dwight D. Eisenhower  

Just so you know, I may use this trick again from time to time to help conserve what little creativity and talent that I have. Have a great week!

2 comments:

Ben said...

What is in honey that allows it to never go bad I wonder?

Tim Higgins said...

Ben,

I wouldn't do this for everybody, but for you I did some research.

It appears that after the nectar is placed in the honeycomb, that the bees fan their wings over it. This reduces the moisture content and increases the sugar concentration of the regurgitated nectar and this in turn, prevents fermentation.

Personally, I think this now belongs in the too much information file...