Wednesday, July 11, 2007

I Have Questions


I have a few questions that I would like to pose to those of you who have taken some part of your day to read this blog (hopefully during work so that you are getting paid to waste your time). While they may appear to be nonsense on the surface, I ask you to please look more closely at the issues presented. Being a curious sort (or is it being sort of curious, I can never remember that one) I have accumulated these questions over time and thought that I would pose them to you in the hope of enlightenment. The fate of the world may not rest on any of the answers to the questions below, but enquiring minds want to know...(Sorry about the rhyme. It was unintentional, but just cheesy enough that I'm not interested in change it.)
  • Is Disneyworld a people trap run by a mouse?
  • Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
  • If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
  • If olive oil is made from olives, then what is baby oil made from? 
  • Why do the call it "The Department of the Interior" when everything they are in charge of is outdoors?
  • During the Korean War, the Korean Air Force claimed a 4 to 1 kill ratio in air battles with the US. The US claimed a 10 to 1 kill ratio in those same battles. If both are true (and governments never lie) who did all of the dying?
  • If its zero degrees outside today and its going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
  • Why do banks charge us a "non-sufficient funds" fee for money that they know we don't have?
  • Why do we speak louder and slower to people who don't understand English?
  • Why do we press the buttons on a remote control harder when we know the battery is dead?
  • Why do the side effects for the medications taken to treat a medical condition usually sound worse than the condition itself?
  • George Lucas came up with incredible technologies for the six movies of "Star Wars", including some rather impressive looking armor used by the stormtroopers. So how come, with this high-tech armor, these guys could be taken down by a bunch of three foot tall fuzzball Ewoks with rocks?
  • Since light travels faster than sound, could that be why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
If anyone comes up with any answers, I would be delighted to hear about them.



5 comments:

Anonymous said...

nice blog... but sooo wordy
ahhas

Corey Richardson said...

If Johnny cracks corn and nobody cares...why is there a song about it?

Corey Richardson said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Department_of_the_Interior

Kat Richardson said...

Great blog! I do have to ponder though, why someone has enough spare time to have this much useless knowledge? Also, if you have this much spare time, where do you apply for your job?

Maureen Gaughan said...

First, to answer your questions:

Yes.

Its an optical illusion.

Isn't it obvious.

Bio-fuel.

Counter-terrorism policy from the office of Homeland Security.

That's why they made new math.

Irrelevant. Al Gore says its not going to be cold any more.

Scientific studies show that bankers have altered DNA.

What?

I wouldn't know, I'm not a man (I don't get to hold the remote).

Rule #1: Never, never read the package insert.

You've got to get over the 80's. I have.

It may be true but not in your case.

You are awesome! Keep up the good writing.