Due To Technical Difficulties

We are never more vulnerable these days than when the technology that we use to prop up our everyday existence fails us. Even when the lack of such technology is merely an inconvenience and not of a life sustaining nature, we find ourselves up the proverbial shit creek without a paddle (pardon my technical jargon). Modern man has seemingly in fact become a victim of his own technological success.


Or so it seemed to me over this last week at least, when the desktop computer that I have been relying on for many years both for these often meandering blog posts and for frequently substandard efforts for the Toledo Free Press suffered a rather sudden, catastrophic, and ignominious passing. There is little doubt that the poor beast was tired, aging even more badly than its erstwhile companion. It should likewise be noted that like most technology, it undoubtedly suffered from possession of a much shorter relative life-span than its biologic pal. Much like a favored pet however, it had been a good and faithful companion, always ready to answer the call for both work and play as it suited the needs and whims of its careless master.

There are some no doubt, who will claim that in fact this ever-present ally suffered an untimely end, victim to the second-hand cigar smoke of one who should probably go nameless (owing no doubt, to a tragic and almost shameful level of cowardice on his part). Personally however, I believe that this explanation is anything but the final word on the subject. In fact, I believe that the recently departed enjoyed a good cigar, even if it was capable of experiencing such rapturous experiences only vicariously. 


Since both wine and whiskey were likewise substances potentially lethal and therefore forbidden to it (and hence only available to its more than willing accomplice), I think that the smell of a good cigar was in fact one of its few careful diversions, and well within its sphere of appreciation in spite of the dire warnings issued on potential hazards.

Even now in its passing, we know that there is no true rest for this all too willing participant in the practice of electronic excess: and that rather than proper ceremony (an Irish wake comes to mind) and a decent burial, it will instead be kept on a shelf like a poor relation ... a ghoulish memory and a potential future donor of components for its newer and more stylish replacement. 


And as I write this poor attempt at a eulogy for the poor creature that in the end gave its all in service, I cannot help but wonder which of us was truly the master. How much of what has been produced was a product (and the fault) of the method and how much that of the mover? I wonder as well how much of the technology that we tell ourselves we are served by in fact has in fact taken that very power from us. 


Forget where most of us would be without the computer, the cell phone (especially those of you with smart phones),or the microwave oven; how many of us would now find life all but unimaginable and unbearable without without email, Twitter, or heaven forbid ... without Facebook? How many of us would be able to perform the oh so vital activities that have become far more than mere routines without the crutch of technologies that we really don't understand and could not substitute for. Sure we could all cook over a fire, but not without an electronic igniter to provide the flame for the propane tank fueling the process on a gas grill. Certainly we could all get from place to place without automobiles, but wouldn't we look damned silly with a GPS unit on a bicycle, let alone a belt (and wouldn't some of us be shocked to discover that all bicycles are not stationary and some walking is not done on treadmills). 


Of course we could all communicate, but imagine what written letters would look like today after the mess we have made of the written word with texting. It is in fact, a curious world that we have created for ourselves, and one that I'm not sure that many of us yet know our place in. How much of what we consider the essential part of ourselves is tied to constant electronic connection and instant gratification? How many of us recognize as we use it, that the very technology we are now so dependent upon changes so fast that by the time most of it becomes commonplace, it's already outdated? 


So it is with one good and faithful electronic soul who will not be with us here today, or ever again in the days to come. For though perhaps this colleague might have been brought back to life (with significant technical effort and at considerable cost), in the end it seemed kinder to simply allow the gentle passing of an existence of one whose day had passed (something that I sometimes feel I understand all too well). Alas, where this long-time cohort is concerned, no future appearances will be possible ... Due to technical difficulties.

That's Not Right #7 - Car Defoggers

I was forced to brave the cold a bit early this morning, since the overnight drop in temperature had managed to ice over the windows of my personal transportation. I duly started the vehicle, turned the heater in the defroster mode, and pushed the button for the rear window defroster, knowing that soon my windows would be clear. The rear window defroster, being of the electric variety, had the window clear of ice and fogging within a minute. The front defroster, running off of my car heater, caught up about 5 minutes later. 

My question here is why can't I have the wires in the windshield? At a time in the automotive industry that gives us electrically heated seats, GPS systems, USB ports to plug my I-pod into, and dual DVD players for the back seats of cars, why can't I have a better system to defrost my windshield? Why some high end vehicles already have electrically heated outside mirrors , in addition to the rear window unit, but no on seems to have come to the conclusion of using this proven technology in a windshield. 

I suppose it's possible that there is a safety issue involved here, but if there is one I am unaware of it, and can't imagine what it would be. Call me silly here people, but it strikes me that auto makers place the better system in the rear window to improve visibility than they do in the front, in spite of the fact that one would think that looking out of the front one would seem to be more important.

If Technology Was The Answer - What Was The Question?

I have held a number of positions over the last 30 years or so (most of which seemed to have had the term 'contributory negligence" attached to them, but that's another story). 

Having done so, I am able to look far back into the dim recesses of history and remember when just about the only means for document delivery was the United States Post Office, and the only means of remote person-to-person communication was Bell Telephone. (and most of those were these really crummy pay phones that we had to try and use from a car while the rain and snow blew in and we froze our butts off) Now I know that such statements date me to a period in history when dinosaurs still roamed the earth and may seem quite unbelievable to those of the current generation, but it is true none the less. More amazing still, is that using these Stone Age tools and moving at the relative snail's pace that this technology afforded us, we were able to resolve the crises of the day and still find a bit of time for ourselves.  

Progress rolled relentlessly forward however, and since then we have been presented with a constant stream of technological improvements. I won't go into the details of the introduction of Xerox and fax machines, Fed Ex overnight delivery, personal computers, cell phones, and the use of the Internet (because I'm trying to become a better writer and I've been told that I can get too wordy); all of which we take for granted today. 

What concerns me however is that as these things were becoming part of the mainstream, promises were made that each would provide us with more free time in our lives. Instead, the opposite seems to have become the case. This incredible access to each other appears to have done nothing except make us more demanding of immediate answers to questions, whether they are necessary to the situation or not. 

No longer content to let a real process of evaluation take place, the world seems to have suddenly become full of two year-olds who have created a dirty diaper and want it changed NOW. This constant intrusion has led to access during meals, while trying to sleep, or even in the bathroom (you would be amazed at how often that this happens), and it never seems to be enough. By short-circuiting the process however, we have replaced the well thought out answer with the quick response. Consequently, we are far too often forced to go back and re-think everything to make up for things that got missed in our haste to respond quickly and ultimately delaying the delivery of a correct answer.  

So let me state the following for the record:

* Fast answers are not necessarily good answers.  
* Timely responses do not mean immediate responses.  
* A well thought out answer is usually better than a knee-jerk reaction.  
* Doing it right once takes less time than doing it over.  

(I would also like to say, while I think that there is a chance that my bosses will read this, that I work long hours and extremely hard to proved the answers requested of me as part of my job. One should never pass up an opportunity to suck up when it presents itself.) Perhaps before demanding an immediate answer we should remember the words of Mark Twain:  

"I was happy to be able to respond promptly. I said that I don't know."