Hilary For President

Those of you who might actually know me probably never thought that you would hear those words come out of my mouth. Well they didn't, they came out of my keyboard. I freely admit to having these thoughts however (I ought to, they brought me straight out of bed screaming), and I choose to use them for some reason other than driving me into expensive daily therapy. 

Planting tongue firmly in cheek then, and blatantly stealing from another source of amusement and entertainment, I will list the "Top Ten" Reasons That Hilary Clinton Should Be President: 

10. With Hilary as Commander-In-Chief, the US might have the first leader since Ronald Reagan that the rest of the world would be afraid of (me too, by the way).  

9. Wouldn't it be fun to see her and Nancy Pelosi fighting for credit over anything that actually got done?  

8. We wouldn't have to worry about government leaks anymore, since everyone in Washington remembers Vince Foster. 

7. We could all take a vacation from thinking or doing anything for ourselves, since Hilary wouldn't allow us to do it even if we wanted to.

6. Having a Clinton back in the White House would bring sex back into government in a way that didn't involve the voters getting screwed. Well, maybe some of the young, female, trailer trash voters , but... 

5. Some of the people thinking about entering the country illegally would turn around, figuring that whatever petty dictatorship that they now know would be better than the one that we would have.  

4. The chance to go from Bush, to Clinton, to Bush, to Clinton is just too screwy to pass up. 

3. Foreign leaders would make shorter visits for fear of leaving their spouses alone with Bill while whatever negotiations were going on. 

2. If Hilary can handle the country's finances like she handled her cattle future investments, we could be debt free as a nation before her first term ends.  

1. Come on, who doesn't want to see Bill as "First Lady"!